As a new tech manager, you are likely eager to get started on your initiatives and make an impact. However, it's important to take the time to establish a strong foundation for your relationship with your team. In today's article I'll discuss one of the most important and overlooked part of the technical management role 1-2-1 regular conversations with direct reports.

Why do we even need a meeting with our direct report?

It is an opportunity for the manager and direct report to have an open and informal conversation. These meetings are not formal project update meetings. Instead they are an opportunity for the both the particpants to know each other well.

Frequency of catch-up

1-2-1 meetings should happen on a regular basis - weekly, fortnightly or monthly. It is important to be flexible as sometimes rescheduling or cancellation can happen.

I recommend experienced managers to meet new members on weekly and old members fortnightly. For new managers I recommend to do it on weekly basis.

Agenda for the Meeting

The agenda for each 1 2 1 will vary depending on what's happening at that point in time but generally it will include:

1. Updates from your direct report on their work – What have they been working on? What challenges have they faced? What successes have they achieved? This gives you a broad overview of what your team is working on so you can ask further questions if needed .

2. Discuss any blockers or issues. If they are stuck on something and ask for help, you can help them brainstorm solutions or offer advice.

3. Check in – How are things going for your direct report? Any major life changes or challenges they’re facing at work or home? Work-life balance? It is an opportunity for you to show they you care beyond their work performance.

4. Coaching and feedback – It is an opportunity for positive reinforcement and constructive feedback. Be specific in your comments whenever possible rather than offering general feedback.

Location of Meeting

Meetings can take place in person or over video call if team members are not at the same location. I would always recommend having at least one face to face meeting per month if possible. In-person meeting, being in the same room helps build better rapport & communication.

Conduct meetings in an informal setting - such as over coffee or lunch (if physical is possible). So that people feel comfortable discussing any issues they may have.

Follow Ups

Trust is hard to build, and it's important that your words and actions match up. If you agree to do something in a meeting, be sure to follow through on it and resolve any issues that come up. Follow-up will help you build authenticity with your team members.

Use tools such as [ToDo] (todo.microsoft.com), or Google task etc. to create checklists and to manage your personal Kanban for effective follow-ups.

Listen

1 2 1 conversations aren't about giving speeches or teaching someone. They're about listening to understand what your team members are saying . Ask questions if necessary to get clarification on anything which wasn't clear. In a multicultural set-up try to be extra careful. Respect your team member communication style. Encourage them to feel safe and to speak their heart without judged.

Active listening is not about being quiet. It is about paying attention and giving non-verbal signals that you understand. Don't give judgement unless asked. Listen and register in your head.

Listening Tip: If you are tempted to speak, take a pause of 5 seconds before you say anything. In the world of noise learn to take pause in your speech. It's not a talking competition.

Skipping 1 2 1

Skipping a 1 2 1 can have some negative consequences. Team member may feel that they are being ignored or disregarded. In all circumstances try not to skip unless the request to skip is from team member themselves.

Some questions to keep the conversation going

• How are they finding the new role?
• What challenges have they encountered so far?
• What motivates them?
• What are their goals for both short and long term?
• Are there any areas where they need more support or guidance from you?
• Are there any tools or processes that could make their job easier/faster/more efficient?

Summary

In conclusion, you need to understand that 1-2-1 is not about you. It's about your team member, so don't make it as a project update meeting. Try to make your team member as comfortable as possible so he can speak to you. Once they speak openly, next job is to build trust by following-up on the agreed actions. Always end your meeting by asking your direct report how can you help him better? (And listen to the answer carefully and try to understand what team member is saying).

Best of luck making people's lives easier each day consistently and continuously!